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Adult SMS Collection
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Paisa GAND ki tarha hota hai,
hota sab k pas hai par dena koi nahi chahta.
Updesh LUND ki tarha hai
dena sab chahte hai lema koi nahi chahta.
Shishe se shisha takray to awaz hoti hai.
Mard se jo aurat takray to awlaad hoti hai..
Hr lund p nam hoga tera,
hr chut p nam hoga mera,
kismat chamkane ka syok h to chudwale bhosdi ki,
varna randi khane p bhi naam hoga tera.
Utho lal ankhe kholo,
pani laya hu gand dholo,
kal raat bahut tum jhele,
bade bade ne lund pele,
gand fat k hui panara,
bhane lagi khun ki dhara.
Jab tak chut phate nahi,
tab tak lund hate nahi.
chut ko tu phad de
uske andar jhaad de.
lund tum mahaan ho
sarv shaktimaan ho,
JAI LUND.
Chut ki darar ho,
gand ki phaad ho.
lund tum ruko nahi
lund tum jhuko nahi.
chut charmra uthe
jhanth kasmasa uthe,
agni sa dhadhak dhadhak
chut mein sarak sarak.
POEM ON LUND-
Lund tum khade raho,
chut me pade raho,
lund jab prachand ho,
to chut khand khand ho,
lund tum ahade chalo,
lund tum badhe chalo.
There was this lady and she really wanted to have sex,
but she was to scared to ask her husband so she went to a jipsy and
told her her problem.The jipsy rummaged around in a chest and pulled
out a pickle jar with a penis in it, and said 'All you have to do is
open the jar and say 'Pickle penis my vigina' and it will start having
sex with you'.So later she tries out the pickle penis and it works
great. That is until her husband walks in and he shouts 'WHAT THE
HELL IS THAT' and the woman says 'It's a pickled penis'
Unfortunately her husband replied 'PICKLE PENIS MY ASS'
Top 5 TV programmes:
1. Kaun marega kisi ki fuddi.
2. Kyun ki saas bhi kabhi chudi thi.
3. Chuttar faadh ke.
4. Kahani lun-lun ki....
5. Ek mahal ho mommo ka..
A bachelor SARDAR gives an AD in a matrimonial.
'Wanted Girl - Age no bar, looks no bar, Money no bar,
But SEX, Baar-baar, Hazaar bar........... Lagataar...........!
Aurat ko choot ki gehraayee pe naaz hai,
To hamein bhi apni lund ki lambaayee pe fakar hai,
Agar uski choot SHABNAM KA SHABAB hai,
To hamara lund bhi LUCKNOW KA NAWAB hai...
A SAD STORY: A boy was so jealous of his newborn brother,
that he put poison on his mother's nipple when she was asleep.
The next day, their DRIVER died.
LIFE is like a PENIS.
sometimes up, stms down.
stms hard,
stms soft.
stms big,
stms small.
stms in,
stms out.
so, enjoy PENIS..
oops, I mean LIFE.
A Sardar was urinating beside a car.
A foreigner said to him
'AAPKE YAHAN POLICE NAHIN PAKADHTI?'
He replied,
'NAHIN HAMAARE YAHAN KHUD PAKADNA PADTA HAI!'
Lady: 'doctor, I feel very weak.' Dr: 'how many times do u have sex?'
Lady: '5 times, mon-fri.' Dr: 'cut down wed.' Lady: 'but that's the only
day I m with my husband!'
Lady to doctor 'a vibrator stuck in my pussy'
Doctor 'lay down, I will take it out'
Lady 'No!, pls. change its battery'.
A man reads a book in a bed next to his wife & his finger went to
tease his wife's pussy. Wife asks 'you want sex?' 'No, just to wet
my finger to turn the page!'
Why r women considered stronger than men?
Ans: B'coz they carry 2 mountains on their chest whereas men carry just
2 stones with the help of crane...
aik aadmi ne billi ki bund maar di.....baad mein usko afsoos hoa to
wo molvee ke pass gaya or kaha :'molvee sahab mein ne billi ki bund
maari hai, mujhy is ka kuffara batao'. molvee ne kaha ke 50 bhookon
ko khana khilao......next day use bhool gaya ke kitne bhookon ko khana
khilana tha......wo dobara molvee ke ghar gaya.......magar is baar use
molvee ke ghar ke darvaze se AZEEB-O-GHAREEB awaazein aein.....wo
under gaya
or molvee se bhookon ki tadaad poochne laga .....molvee ne kaha
0:'yaar! ye mein tumhein baad mein bataoon ga, pehle tu ye bata ke
billi kis tarah pakree thee'
aik raat aik aadmi apni bivi se kehta hai ke mere se gand marwa lo mein
tumhein CITY le ker doon ga......magar bivi ne kaha nahee........
aadmi bola ke gand marwa lo tumhein mein CIVIC le doon ga......
magar bivi ne kaha nahee.......us aadmi ke baite ne kaha 'Aba meri gaand
mar lo or mujhey CYCLE le do
Ek ladki ko koi umgli karke bhag gaya.
piche 65 sal ka baba tha,
ladki boli baba miss cal aap ne ki?
baba dhoti uthakar: meri to validty khatm ho gai hai.
BUS STOP pe ek ladki whisper ka packet lekar khadi thi,
BHIKARI: kuch dedo...
LADKI:kuch nahi hai.
BHIKARI:yeh... bred ka packet dedo,
LADKI:kal aana sos laga kar dungi.
NEWTON BRA LOW: Elasticity of a bra is directly proportional to weight
of two boobs and inversly proportional to distance B/W 2 nipples.
Cycle aur ladki mein kaya difference hai...
Cycle mein gaand rakh kar tange hilana padta hai aur ladki mein tange
rakh kar gaand hilana padta hai..!
FRIENDSHIP like hair on PENIS,
every time u shave,
it grows again and again and become harder and harder,
thanks being my LAWDE KE BAAL...
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