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Funny SMS Collection
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Teacher. Bachon wada kro cigrett shrab nahi pioge.
bachey:nahi pienge.
Teacher:larkio ka pecha nahi karoge
bachey:nahi karnge
Teacher:un pr awazen nahi kaso ge.
bachey: nahi kasenge.
Teacher: apni zindagi watan pr qurban karoge.
bachey: karenge,asi zindgi ka karna bhi kia he.
1 memon subha so ko utha to
dekha ke uski biwi mar gaye hay.
Wo foran kitchen me gaya or
apni beti ko galay laga kar rony laga or
bola,“1 banday ka nashta kam banana”
Devils went to Court to Prove
that he is The Most,
Cruel & wicked Guy on Earth.
But he Failed, He Came Out Angrily & Asked,
Yaar ye “ALTAF BHAI” kon hai?
Wife:Please bike taze na chalao
mujhey dar lag raha hay.
Sardar: Agar tujhy bhi dar lag raha hay
to meri tarah ankhein band kar lay.:P
What is BUSINESS ?
Dad: I want u 2 marry a girl of my choice.
Son: No
Dad: The girl is Bill Gate’s daughter.
Son: then Ok.
Dad goes o Bill Gates.
Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son.
Bill Gates: No
Dad: My son is the CEO of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Than ok
Dad goes 2 the President of the World Bank.
Dad:Appoint my son as the CEO of your bank.
President:No
Dad:He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President: Then OK
That’s business…!!
Baap:
Itne kum marks..??
2 thappar lagne chahiyen.!!
Beta: Han papa!
mein nay to us kameenay mastar
ka ghar bhi dekh liya hay…!!
Boy 2 God:
Give me a pocket full of money,
A job & a big vehicle full of girls.
God replied:your wish is fullfilled
&
He became a bus conductor of karachi university point.:p
Man1 sitting with dog.
Man2:Your dog bits?
Man1:No
Man 2 sits and the dog bits!
Man2 angrily, you said he does not bit!
Man:That is not my dog.
A student was asked 2 write
a signboard 4 the traffic rules
near da college campus
He wrote:-
“Drive Carefully!
Don’t kill the students,
wait for the Teachers”
Before Marriage:-
He: yes! atlast it was so hard 2 wait
she:do you want me 2 leave?
He: No! don’t even think about it
She: do you love me ?
He:ofcourse! over n over!
She:have u ever cheated on me?
He:No!y r u even asking?
She:will u go on wid me on picnic?
He:every chance I get!
She:will u hit me ?
He:R u crazy?I’m not that kind of person!
She:can I trust u?
He:yes..
She: Darling!
After marriage…
Now simply read from bottom to top
Man at medical store:I need poison
Chemist: I can’t sell you that
Man shows his marriage certificate
.
.
.
Chemist: Oh! sorry,
I didn’t knew u had a prescription.
Newspaper Mein News Lugi K
“50% Of Sardars Are Donkeys”
The Sardars Protested.
Next Day News Lagi K
“50% Of Sardars R Not Donkeys”
The Sardars Celebrated.
Memon ka beta apni girl friend
k sath date maar ker ghar aaya
to baap nay pocha,
kitnay paisay kharch karey?
Beta: Rs.50.
Baap:itne saray kion??
Beta: us k paas itne hi thay.
1 memon k ghar ko aag lag gai,
woh ghar ko bacha nahin saka,
guess kion?
because wo sari raat fre brigade
walon ko miss calls marta raha.
1 girl ask 2 pappu : woh kia hai jo cow k paas 4 or mere paas 2 hain?
pappu : legs
Girl : woh kia hai jo tumhari pant main hai aur meri pant mein nahi hai?
pappu: paisay
Girl : woh kia hai jo log din main karne k bajaye ko raat bistar pe kartay hain
pappu: neend puri karte hain
girl : woh kia hai jo larki pehli daffa karwate huye pain
ki wajah se roti hai?
pappu : kaan main ched
MORAL : aap bhi apni zehniat pappu ki tarhan saaf rakhain
Macher ne 1 admi ko din main kata,
admi ne kaha:”tum to rat main kat’tay hona?”
Macher bola,”ghar k halat kharab hain over time ker raha hon.”
Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
In pakistan survey was done:
How many girls want to meet with Saquib
Survey repot
5% says yes
0% says no
95% says kuhawab maat dikhao
Humari aise kismat kaha
Mushraf ki niyat
“Niyat karta hoon 2 molvi marne ki.
6 rocket fire farz.
Wasty bUSH uncle k.
Muon mera Jamia hafza ki tarf”
Musharaf Reema ka haath pakar kar bola:
“Aao kamray mein chalain”
Reema; “Ki faida, wardi tey tu lani nai”
Premika premi se: main maa Bannay wali hoon.
Premi: kya baat kar rahi ho yum hosh me to ho.
Premika: haan
Premi: Magar ham nay tou kabhi kiss tuk nahin kari
Premika: haan mai tumhare daddy se shad
Ek din bhagwan sharab peeny
zameen per aa giya 50 boltle peenay
k baad dukan wala bola
“ap ko charti nahi hay?”
bhagwan: main bhagwan hun
Club wala: charh gaye salay ko
jo jita wo sikandar
jo haare wo jail ke Ander,
jo sms bheje us ko jadu ki jhappi,
jo na bheje usko
BANDAR ki pappi…..
*****
((@..@))
( * )
Samandar Bhar Syllabus Hota Hai
Nadi Bhar Parh Pate Hein
Balti Barh Yad Rehta Hai
Chuloo Bhar Number Ate Hein
Jis Mein Hum Doob Jatey Hain
Husband - tum kon hoo
Biwi - pagal hogay kiya apni Biwi koo bhol gaye
HUSBAND - nasha her gham bhola deta hai
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