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Sardarji Joke SMS Collection
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Sardar : Apne bete se bola, Bevakuf…kaisa machis leke aaya
hai, ek bhi tili nahin jalti.
Beta : Kya baat karte ho papa, sab tili test karke laya hu.
Sardarji is trying to commit suicide on the railway:
Apne saath wine and chicken bhi leke jata hain.
Koi usko rokta hai or poochta hai “Kyon bhai,
ye sab kyon leke baithe ho?”
Sardarji keheta hai,
“Sala train late aati hai kahin bhook se na mar jaun”.
Sardarji zebra crossing ke black & white patte par bar bar
Idhar-udhar chalte the, woh kya soch rahe,
honge….think…
“SALA YE PIANO BAJTA KYO NAHI”
Santa : “During my operation, Nurse, I heard the surgeon use a four-letter word that upset me very much.”
Nurse : “What word was that?”
Santa : “Oops!”
SARDAR : Yaar maine apni girl friend ko gift dena hai, kya dun?
2ND : Gold ring de de.
1ST : Koi badi cheez bata?
2ND : M.R.F ka tyre de de.
Sardar talking on cell.
2ND Sardar: Kis se baat kar raho ho?
1ST : Biwi se…
2ND : Itne… pyaar se?
1ST : Tumhari hai…
1 Sardar indian flag lene shop par gaya.
Flag dekhkar sardar kuch bola
Jise sunkar shopkeeper pareshan ho gaya…
Guess woh kya bola???
Is mein aur colour dikhao.
Sardar apni sister ke saath bike pe ja raha tha.
Boy: Oh! Paaji girlfriend k saath kaha ja rahe ho.
Sardar: Oye! Girlfriend hogi teri meri to sister hai.
Teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote ” No match, due to rain!!!”
SARDAR : KAL JO SHAMPOO LIYA THA USKE SAATH WALA FREE GIFT DO.
SHOPKEEPER : USKE SAATH KOI FREE GIFT NAHI HAI..
SARDAR : MUJHE BEVAKUFF MAT SAMJO USPAR LIKHA HAI "DANDRF FREE"
sardar on telephone : maa ek khus khabri hai...
maa : kya khus khabri hai ?
sardar : aaj hum do se teen ho gaye....
maa : mubarak ho.. ladka hua ya ladki ?
sardar : meri biwi ne dusri shaadi karli hai...
ek aadmi raat me telescope se aasman ko dekh raha tha utne me ek tara gira.. to niche khada hua sardar bolo wah boss wah kya nishana lagaya hai.......
parvez musharf : jab main peida hua tha tab miletry walo ne 51 topo ki salami di thi......
sardar : kamaal hai... saala sabka nishana chuk gaya.....
Jugnu Singh got up in the middle of the night to answer the telephone.
"Is this one one one one?", says the voice.
"No, this is eleven eleven."
"Are you sure it isn't one one one one?"
"No, this is eleven eleven."
"Well, wrong number. I am Harpal calling, sorry to have woken you up in the middle of the night."
"That's all right, mister. I had to get up to answer the telephone anyway."
Santa: What is ANOTHER difference between a MOSQUITO and a FLY?
Banta: A FLY can FLY but a MOSQUITO cannot MOSQUITO!
A Sardarji bought a new car. Next day he is driving his car to office. On the way he was waiting for the Signal. Suddenly he opened the door and got down. Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him,
"How much should I pay to turn right?"
The Policeman was astonished and asked,
'Why are you asking like this?'
Then Sardarji showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: 'Free Left Turn'
Sardarji: Nurse, I am very eager to know my blood group.
Nurse: B positive
Sardarji: please tell me soon ....
Nurse: B positive
Sardarji: Madam, I am positive, but I'm eager to know my blood group.
Two Sardarjis, both student of I.I.T, Kanpur, were talking about the American Astronauts.
One said to the other, "What's the big deal about going to the moon-anybody can go to the moon. We are sardars we will go direct to the sun."
"But if we get within 13 million miles from the sun, we'll melt."
And the first answered, "So what, we'll go at night."
Intelligent Banta
Banta returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father.\\" Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?\\"
\\"No son, that's because you are intelligent. \\"
Banta seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, \\"Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am Sardar ??\\"
\\"No son, that's because you are intelligent,\\" replies his father.
Happy with the answer, Banta poses another question to his father, \\"Dad, today we had Medical Examination, all the other boys were shorter than me, I was atleast twice their height. Is that because I am Sardar ??\\"
The father replies, \\"No son, that's because you are 31 years old.\\"
One day evening a Sardarji starts from office to home with pushing his scooter manually. He met his friend on the way... Friend: why are you pushing your scooter manually? Sardarji: 'I forgot to bring the scooter key from my home. Friend: 'Is it! Then, How did you come to office from home in the morning?' Sardarji: 'I was pushing my scooter from home to office also in the morning.
Once, two Sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games
of chess to pass the time.
They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends
dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -
"Come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!"
Our Sardar, one day is at the railway station. He asks one man "When will Rajdhani Express go from here"?Man Replies 12.30. "When will Punjab Express go from here"?Man Replies 10.30. "When will Deccan Queen go from here"?Man Replies 12.30. Thus the sardar goes on asking for all the trains. Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants to go to punjab by train or not.Sardar replies, "NO. I only want to cross the tracks!"
While travelling a sardar was carrying a binocular with him.
But he never seemed to use it while looking outside the window.
A co-passenger who was travelling with him asked why he was carrying binoculars.
The sardar simply said ...
"I am on my way to see a distant relative."
Once a Sardarji went to the city of Mumbai for the first time to meet his father. His father had asked him to keep walking in the direction of the sunrise until he eventually reached hishouse. Since, the Sardarji was new to the city he decided to ask a passerby the direction in which the sun rose in Mumbai - east, west, north or south?The passerby who was also a Sardarji thought for some time and then said, "Main bhi is sheher mein naya aaya hoon!" ( I am also new in this city!)
biography of a sardar
When God passed out looks,
I thought He said books, and I didn't want any.
When God passed out ears,
I thought He said beers, and I asked for two long ones.
When God passed out legs,
I thought He said kegs, and I asked for two fat ones.
When God passed out noses,
I thought He said roses, and I asked for a big red one.
When God passed out heads,
I thought He said beds, and I asked for a big soft one.
When God passed out brains,
I thought he said trains, and I missed mine.
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